雅思寫作一直是雅思考生需要攻克的難題。那么通關(guān)秘笈是什么?很顯然,雅思寫作模板的時(shí)代已經(jīng)過(guò)去了。 “英文寫作邏輯和銜接”才是那條通往羅馬的必經(jīng)之路。參照雅思官方發(fā)布的評(píng)分標(biāo)準(zhǔn),不難看出雅思對(duì)英文寫作邏輯的重視: “邏輯與銜接”(Coherence and Cohesion)為四項(xiàng)寫作評(píng)分原則之一。以6分的標(biāo)準(zhǔn)為例,寫作評(píng)分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)中對(duì)“邏輯與銜接”是這樣描述的:
l arranges information and ideas coherently and there is a clear overall progression (連貫地組織信息及論點(diǎn),總體來(lái)說(shuō),能清晰地推進(jìn)行文發(fā)展)
l uses cohesive devices effectively, but cohesion within and/or between sentences may be faulty or mechanical (有效地使用銜接手段,但句內(nèi)及/或句間的銜接有時(shí)有誤或過(guò)于機(jī)械)
所謂“清晰的推進(jìn)行文發(fā)展”(見(jiàn)圖表1中紅色字體部分),至少要做到文章中使用到準(zhǔn)確、有效的邏輯連詞(logical conjunction) 又名信號(hào)詞。信號(hào)詞對(duì)于文章過(guò)程的連貫起到了作用, 它也是英語(yǔ)寫作中眾多過(guò)渡手段之一。雅思寫作中常用到的邏輯連詞按照分類如下10類:
(1)表示遞進(jìn):and, also, too, in addition, moreover, besides ,furthermore, not only… but also…, along with, next, what’s more.
(2)表示時(shí)間: after, before, soon, when, until, during, immediately, then.
(3)表示舉例: for example, for instance, such as, that is, in other words, in fact.
(4)表示相同即第二個(gè)觀點(diǎn)在某些方面和第一個(gè)觀點(diǎn)相似:Like, as, similarly, in the some way, as well, too, equally, likewise.
(5)表示不同,即觀點(diǎn)和我們所期望的觀點(diǎn)不同(讀者需要對(duì)下一句的意思轉(zhuǎn)換做好準(zhǔn)備):Unlike, in contrast with\to, whereas, on the contrary, on the other hand, instead, but, however, yet, although, nevertheless, even though, in spite of, despite, rather than.
(6)表示因果:since, because, due to, owing to, for, as, because of, on account of, as a result, therefore, thus, hence, so, consequently, so…that.
(7)表示目的:in order to, in the hope that, so as to, so that.
(8)表示總結(jié) in conclusion, on the whole, to conclude, to sum up, finally, at last.
(9)表示順序:first, then, next, after that, finally, last of all, still, soon, later, initially.
(10)表示條件:if, unless, on condition that, as long as, in case, suppose.
這些起橋梁作用的過(guò)渡詞語(yǔ)(Transitional Words\Phrases) 把文章有條理的銜接起來(lái),使整篇文章流暢自然、語(yǔ)義連貫。
然而,這些看似簡(jiǎn)單的詞語(yǔ),在實(shí)際寫作中卻不容易掌握。根據(jù)近幾年學(xué)生作文的情況來(lái)看,大部分學(xué)生都開(kāi)始有意識(shí)的使用連接詞來(lái)達(dá)到語(yǔ)篇的邏輯連貫,但在使用上仍存在問(wèn)題。 下面我們重點(diǎn)分析幾個(gè)常見(jiàn)問(wèn)題:
1. 漏用邏輯連詞。如:
1Home-working enables employees to work at ease. For example, those with childcare responsibilities could arrange their schedule flexibly. 2Working at home ensures employers’ multiple options in human resource.
仔細(xì)理解不難發(fā)現(xiàn)其實(shí)1句和2句之間的關(guān)系是平等的,均屬于觀點(diǎn)句。為了讓這兩個(gè)句子凸顯出相應(yīng)的地位,以區(qū)別中間的舉例部分,建議在1句和2句之前各添加表示遞進(jìn)的邏輯連詞,如what’s more或 in addition. 修改后如下文:
To begin with, home-working enables employees to work at ease. For example, those with childcare responsibilities could arrange their schedule flexibly. What’s more, working at home ensures employers’ multiple options in human resource…
2. 錯(cuò)用邏輯連詞,如:
1One hand, home-working enables employees to work at ease. 2Nevertheless, these who are disabled can avoid many difficulties.
原文中1句和2句的邏輯連詞都用錯(cuò)了。首先,從語(yǔ)法形式上看,邏輯連接詞一般由連詞、連接副詞、介詞、介詞短語(yǔ)等充當(dāng)。而1句的句首“one hand”是一個(gè)名詞短語(yǔ),證明不正確。我們需要做的修改是將“one hand”改成一個(gè)介詞短語(yǔ)“on one hand”作為1句的邏輯連詞;而相對(duì)應(yīng)的邏輯連詞應(yīng)該是“on the other hand”,銜接與1句中觀點(diǎn)相對(duì)應(yīng)的另一方觀點(diǎn)。比如:
On one hand, home-working enables employees to work at ease. On the other hand, employees may be confronted with some problems brought by home-working.
而對(duì)于2句中的連詞使用錯(cuò)誤是“nevertheless”這個(gè)邏輯詞的意義與2句中的內(nèi)涵不符。原文中的2句 these who are disabled can avoid many difficulties 是對(duì)1句觀點(diǎn)的一個(gè)擴(kuò)展和支持。所以2句和1句之間的邏輯不應(yīng)該是nevertheless所表達(dá)的轉(zhuǎn)折關(guān)系;相反,應(yīng)該是遞進(jìn)或舉例關(guān)系,所以可以做以下修改:
On one hand, home-working enables employees to work at ease, especially to those who are disabled, who can avoid many difficulties by working at home.
或者修改為:
On one hand, home-working enables employees to work at ease. For example, those workers who are disables can avoid many difficulties by working at home.
3. 濫用邏輯連接詞。有的雅思考生主觀地認(rèn)為盡量多用連接詞語(yǔ)可以加強(qiáng)句際銜接,但結(jié)果是連接詞語(yǔ)過(guò)分堆積,造成多余,評(píng)分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)中所提到的“機(jī)械”地句子銜接(見(jiàn)上文下劃線部分)。如:
1Working at home ensures employers’ multiple options in human resource. 2However, if they hire staff through modern technologies, such as internet, fax, or telephone. 3It is hard to know how the employee’s quality is which takes disadvantages of the company. 4 Although it is hardly capitalize on employer.
請(qǐng)注意紅色字體標(biāo)注的部分,均屬于濫用邏輯連詞的部分??梢?看到,在4個(gè)句子中,這位考生錯(cuò)用了3個(gè)邏輯連詞。這個(gè)現(xiàn)象屬于 “makes inadequate, inaccurate or over-use of cohesive devices(銜接手段不足、不準(zhǔn)確或過(guò)度使用)”——這是5分寫作水平的評(píng)價(jià)。為了改善這個(gè)問(wèn)題,達(dá)到6分的標(biāo)準(zhǔn),建議可以做如下修改:
1Working at home ensures employers’ multiple options in human resource. 2However, if they hire staff through modern technologies, such as internet, fax, or telephone,3 it is hard to know how efficient the employees are. 4Therefore, home-working can hardly benefit employers.
1句是觀點(diǎn)句,保持不變。根據(jù)意義判斷,原文的2句是想要反駁該觀點(diǎn),所以原文中使用however是正確的。問(wèn)題是表示條件的邏輯連詞if后面引導(dǎo)的是從句,而原文當(dāng)中卻沒(méi)有相應(yīng)的主從關(guān)系句型跟if搭配,導(dǎo)致嚴(yán)重錯(cuò)誤。修改方法是將2句和3句之間的句號(hào)改為逗號(hào),使3句成為2句的主句,突出if條件句的主次關(guān)系。對(duì)于原文的4句來(lái)說(shuō),用邏輯連詞although是不恰當(dāng)?shù)?。因?yàn)轱@然句子內(nèi)容想要表達(dá)的是對(duì)前面三句的一個(gè)小總結(jié),因此邏輯關(guān)系應(yīng)該用therefore來(lái)引導(dǎo)。
通過(guò)本文,我們了解到雅思寫作中邏輯銜接的一個(gè)重要手段——邏輯連詞的使用是如何影響寫作得分的。我們也可以通過(guò)例子看到中國(guó)的雅思考生在使用邏輯連詞的過(guò)程中最容易出現(xiàn)問(wèn)題。我的建議是僅僅通過(guò)記憶更多類似的詞匯是不足以實(shí)現(xiàn)提高分?jǐn)?shù)的目的的,我們還需要有意識(shí)地閱讀考官的范文,通過(guò)模仿的手段來(lái)表現(xiàn)自己英文寫作內(nèi)容才能夠?qū)崿F(xiàn)突破。